279 Elise Luyckx Hoe Ze Naast Enterprise Architecte Haar Podcast Verbonden Startte En Ze Bij Toastmasters Zelf De Micro In Handen Neem | What's On Your Mind? (Dutch/Nederlands)

[00:00:00] Hi there! An Enterprise Architecte.

[00:00:04] Yes, that's the role Elise Luyckx is currently doing or filling.

[00:00:11] You've been able to sit in a burnout for years,

[00:00:16] where you can write letters like you wrote in our conversation.

[00:00:22] Yes, you can't really work.

[00:00:23] She's taking us into her story, how she's doing it differently

[00:00:29] to make sure that she doesn't get in the situation too much.

[00:00:32] Very boring, so I'm talking to Elise, her fan. Enjoy!

[00:00:36] Welcome to Whats On Your Mind with Peter Snauwaert.

[00:00:40] Every week a guest tells about his or her story.

[00:00:43] And that story can inspire you to take your life into your hands.

[00:00:47] Wait, that's very interesting.

[00:00:51] When you're sick, you feel responsible,

[00:00:55] and you say, don't blow in, but work.

[00:01:01] And you feel that you're sick.

[00:01:05] I'm going to do that too.

[00:01:07] Yes, that's good.

[00:01:14] Especially you've planned out a day,

[00:01:16] that you wanted to do.

[00:01:17] That always fits in a big scheme for me.

[00:01:21] And then I want to show up.

[00:01:28] I want to be there for my boss, my colleagues.

[00:01:34] On the other hand, if you don't go, it won't work either.

[00:01:43] And you don't want to go into detail about what you were doing.

[00:01:48] But when you feel that you're alive,

[00:01:52] you can't do it.

[00:01:53] You can't do your best version of yourself.

[00:01:57] You show up, but you've been there for 5% of the time.

[00:02:03] And yesterday I had planned out a recording of my podcast.

[00:02:09] So I had to call people in the morning,

[00:02:11] but I also gave them the message that they didn't want to go to bed.

[00:02:15] I can't be there today,

[00:02:17] because we're recording.

[00:02:20] So I have to do it.

[00:02:24] Is that something you're working on,

[00:02:27] that you're listening to?

[00:02:28] I see what you're studying,

[00:02:31] what you're doing as an enterprise architect.

[00:02:34] I can see that you're very busy.

[00:02:37] And that you have to be in the whole business of your life.

[00:02:40] Maybe 7 years old, because what's your life like?

[00:02:44] 31.

[00:02:45] I can say that easily now,

[00:02:50] that I'm busy, but I wasn't there at all.

[00:02:55] Is there something you feel that you're alive from?

[00:03:00] If there's a tension, or if you want to say something,

[00:03:04] I see that in my head,

[00:03:06] that you're a third-party doctor, you have to rest.

[00:03:09] Then I just go on.

[00:03:10] I'm not a man, but...

[00:03:13] Yes, I try to do that.

[00:03:18] Because I understand my body,

[00:03:21] I have to respect it, because I need it.

[00:03:24] That's my vehicle, my vessel,

[00:03:28] of what I have to do.

[00:03:30] My head can still want so much.

[00:03:34] It can eventually dream and think things over.

[00:03:37] I want this and that.

[00:03:39] I'm someone who's very driven,

[00:03:43] and who really wants to go for the pit bull,

[00:03:46] but then it's like that for me,

[00:03:47] I'm on time, but I need that body.

[00:03:51] That's also a priority.

[00:03:52] So how do I feel emotionally or physically?

[00:03:57] For me it's fine.

[00:04:00] That's all I have, that's the most important thing.

[00:04:03] I can't do anything else.

[00:04:04] Did you learn that, or did you learn that yourself in a certain time?

[00:04:08] I did study health for myself,

[00:04:13] with a lot of patience.

[00:04:14] I've been through a lot of things.

[00:04:16] That's what the mindset of wanting to do things for a long term has given me.

[00:04:25] Last year I had a crack,

[00:04:28] then I was in burnout,

[00:04:30] and then I felt that my body was really in overdrive.

[00:04:36] Even if I was in a calm position,

[00:04:38] I have a smartwatch now,

[00:04:40] when I'm in a calm position,

[00:04:42] I sometimes have a heart attack over the 100.

[00:04:46] Really?

[00:04:47] That happens with a choc.

[00:04:50] Or even in fitness and sports.

[00:04:54] So I just put my foot on the floor,

[00:04:55] I was getting weaker,

[00:04:57] I looked at my horoscope,

[00:04:58] I was thinking, my heart was over the 100.

[00:05:02] And then I thought,

[00:05:04] wait, I'm going to break my body in this way.

[00:05:08] Maybe that's where we're giving time,

[00:05:10] that we're giving priority,

[00:05:14] and pushing a little less.

[00:05:18] Okay.

[00:05:20] And did the doctor or someone else tell you,

[00:05:25] okay,

[00:05:29] don't go any further,

[00:05:31] you have to rest?

[00:05:33] And from now on, you're going to listen to your life?

[00:05:35] Or is it that you yourself

[00:05:38] feel the limits of your life

[00:05:40] and that you're something like,

[00:05:41] if I go any further,

[00:05:44] I wouldn't go any further.

[00:05:47] And do you do that now?

[00:05:49] Or is that the thing that stands up,

[00:05:51] you feel your life,

[00:05:53] you listen to it, you act on it?

[00:05:55] Is that different from before?

[00:05:57] Yes, that's what it is.

[00:06:00] For me, the signal of Purnout,

[00:06:04] that was noticeable to me

[00:06:05] when I was looking for the job.

[00:06:07] And I thought, oh,

[00:06:08] 8 hours of work today,

[00:06:11] that's impossible.

[00:06:13] And then I thought, 3 hours of work today,

[00:06:15] that's impossible.

[00:06:16] So in a period of 2 weeks,

[00:06:19] I was building the number of hours

[00:06:21] that I could do effectively

[00:06:23] for my job.

[00:06:25] I was really building it off.

[00:06:26] So I had a week

[00:06:27] that I could focus on my job

[00:06:32] for an hour or three,

[00:06:33] where I was thinking to myself,

[00:06:35] oh, I'm going to have to take this tomorrow,

[00:06:37] and my mind is shaking,

[00:06:40] it's a feeling of relief.

[00:06:42] It's actually shaking up.

[00:06:43] With guilt?

[00:06:44] With guilt.

[00:06:46] Until the point where I really say

[00:06:48] that I have to be sick,

[00:06:49] I'm sick at this moment,

[00:06:51] I'm going to make myself sick.

[00:06:55] But then it goes to a doctor

[00:06:56] and he says

[00:06:58] how long do you want to rest

[00:07:00] or how long do you want to sit?

[00:07:01] And I say, well, one day,

[00:07:02] two days,

[00:07:04] and the doctor looks at me and

[00:07:05] I think, oh, in 2 weeks,

[00:07:09] then I come home and I think

[00:07:10] okay, 2 weeks rest,

[00:07:13] time for myself,

[00:07:14] but what is that actually?

[00:07:15] Do you watch a lot of movies?

[00:07:18] Well, the funny thing was

[00:07:20] I came home and made a plan.

[00:07:22] What do you want to do in those 2 weeks?

[00:07:24] Oh my God, Elise.

[00:07:26] It's actually just the worst time

[00:07:28] you have to be.

[00:07:30] Is planning that important to you?

[00:07:33] Is it really that

[00:07:35] that it lasts until that

[00:07:38] lasts and is it in every

[00:07:39] part of your life?

[00:07:41] Is there something

[00:07:41] that comes up with the bohemian,

[00:07:44] hippie, painting,

[00:07:45] the rest?

[00:07:47] I can see that you were

[00:07:49] diving.

[00:07:51] You said you can't plan

[00:07:52] when you're underwater.

[00:07:54] Does that mean that there

[00:07:55] is a moment of

[00:07:57] you're wrong?

[00:08:06] Of course.

[00:08:08] That's what I'm

[00:08:11] as a time-schema

[00:08:12] in my life,

[00:08:14] but for example,

[00:08:16] the Toastmasters

[00:08:18] because we have

[00:08:21] a meeting on Sunday

[00:08:22] you're already

[00:08:24] on what day are you going to do that?

[00:08:29] That's

[00:08:29] very structured.

[00:08:31] And the weeks before that

[00:08:33] I think I'm going to live

[00:08:34] in that direction.

[00:08:35] So then you're just writing a speech

[00:08:37] and then you're

[00:08:38] preparing that role.

[00:08:40] And you're

[00:08:42] working with it

[00:08:44] until a deadline

[00:08:46] and on the deadline itself,

[00:08:48] the Toastmasters meeting

[00:08:50] or is that

[00:08:51] the stage will be there

[00:08:52] in those 5 minutes.

[00:08:56] So it's always

[00:08:58] structured.

[00:08:59] Very plan-like.

[00:09:01] Did you already have that role?

[00:09:04] No.

[00:09:07] I think

[00:09:08] I've always been a very

[00:09:09] dramatic child.

[00:09:12] Very creative.

[00:09:14] Very creative.

[00:09:15] It seems like you're

[00:09:17] always thinking about what you want.

[00:09:19] That's not true.

[00:09:21] No.

[00:09:22] No, I'm

[00:09:24] very creative in my

[00:09:27] job, in my hobbies

[00:09:29] that Toastmasters give me.

[00:09:32] I'm very creative with it.

[00:09:34] I do

[00:09:35] things different

[00:09:37] as the other

[00:09:39] that then

[00:09:41] I try

[00:09:43] to look for a different

[00:09:45] kind of speech.

[00:09:47] So I

[00:09:48] look for new things

[00:09:51] often from myself.

[00:09:53] My work I do that too.

[00:09:55] There are a lot of

[00:09:57] frameworks and such that you

[00:09:58] can do an IT architecture.

[00:10:02] I started

[00:10:03] from an economy

[00:10:05] and

[00:10:06] I started with it.

[00:10:10] I didn't know anything about IT

[00:10:11] but I came to

[00:10:12] to learn more about it.

[00:10:14] And then the combination with

[00:10:16] creativity

[00:10:18] I like making documents

[00:10:20] I like making screens and

[00:10:22] overviews.

[00:10:24] It can be nice.

[00:10:25] For the eye.

[00:10:27] I need to be correct.

[00:10:29] I look for the right word

[00:10:32] in such screens.

[00:10:34] And also

[00:10:35] to bring it into a group.

[00:10:37] For me it's all creativity

[00:10:40] that I interpret.

[00:10:42] And the planning

[00:10:43] part itself

[00:10:45] what is it?

[00:10:46] Is it one of the studies?

[00:10:48] Or was it before

[00:10:49] what you call burnout

[00:10:52] wasn't it planned like that?

[00:10:53] And now it's planned because it's a solution

[00:10:55] for that to be around, but with that

[00:10:57] you have limits?

[00:10:59] I've been very hard on my fingers

[00:11:02] because I always dreamed

[00:11:05] by a titular

[00:11:06] a teacher

[00:11:08] and then

[00:11:10] I got a test

[00:11:12] because of that teacher

[00:11:14] and she also said that I really had to

[00:11:17] step up

[00:11:18] if I wanted to achieve things

[00:11:20] that I really had to take on things better.

[00:11:24] And then I really started

[00:11:25] to be a

[00:11:27] optimal planner

[00:11:29] and I realized that I

[00:11:32] realized things there.

[00:11:33] That I really knew

[00:11:34] that if I studied

[00:11:37] then I knew that was a deadline

[00:11:39] sorry, I'm going to hear

[00:11:42] I'm talking to the microphone

[00:11:43] But that's okay, that's okay.

[00:11:45] So if I

[00:11:48] studied

[00:11:49] then I knew that was a deadline

[00:11:51] and I had to be able to do this

[00:11:53] and then I could let the planning go

[00:11:55] but

[00:11:57] I thought making the plan

[00:11:58] was also very fun.

[00:12:00] So I was already doing my studies

[00:12:03] that

[00:12:04] my very strict planning

[00:12:06] with

[00:12:08] also free-range, planned

[00:12:10] What? Free?

[00:12:12] Yes, so I was planning

[00:12:13] that day I was going to study

[00:12:15] and then those other days

[00:12:16] two days of knowledge

[00:12:18] three weeks after a piece

[00:12:21] then I had variation

[00:12:22] and then one extra day

[00:12:24] to catch up

[00:12:25] to catch up

[00:12:26] I think

[00:12:28] and then

[00:12:30] I found pleasure in making the plan

[00:12:33] and I realized

[00:12:34] that was very fun, with colors

[00:12:36] and with maps

[00:12:37] and that was also a bit of a thrill for me

[00:12:41] because sometimes I cut with paper

[00:12:44] but the dream

[00:12:45] there is still a lot in your car

[00:12:48] but okay

[00:12:49] and

[00:12:51] but the plan is not

[00:12:52] I have big dreams

[00:12:54] dreamers

[00:12:56] but I started planning

[00:12:58] because I knew then

[00:12:59] I can realize those dreams

[00:13:00] Is it a February birth machine?

[00:13:03] July

[00:13:05] without child

[00:13:06] Leo

[00:13:07] Oh yes, July

[00:13:12] Now

[00:13:15] when I went back to that burnout period

[00:13:18] I took a podcast

[00:13:19] it is not yet available

[00:13:21] with Johan Kreisman

[00:13:23] from ERA

[00:13:25] and he says

[00:13:30] people who do something

[00:13:32] they like to do

[00:13:37] yes

[00:13:37] yes

[00:13:40] they can do that

[00:13:41] 16 hours a day

[00:13:43] so

[00:13:44] but what about people who

[00:13:46] call it burnout

[00:13:47] who do it for an hour

[00:13:50] but it is in nature

[00:13:51] that is now my own word

[00:13:52] in nature

[00:13:55] that is because they do things

[00:13:56] that is not for a market

[00:13:57] Is there a difference

[00:14:00] what you do

[00:14:02] and how you feel

[00:14:03] before and after that?

[00:14:07] I want to go back

[00:14:09] to what you said

[00:14:12] when you say burnout

[00:14:14] you have

[00:14:14] a good feeling

[00:14:15] they never call it burnout

[00:14:18] so you sit there

[00:14:19] without someone to label

[00:14:21] but do you label yourself?

[00:14:25] I say it

[00:14:27] that was a period

[00:14:28] when I was working

[00:14:30] so I could not function

[00:14:32] on my work

[00:14:34] but actually on my life

[00:14:36] I could not do anything

[00:14:38] I said a period

[00:14:41] unassured

[00:14:42] do you do things that you like

[00:14:43] because that is an important nuance

[00:14:45] you can do things that you like

[00:14:47] but even if you really do it in burnout

[00:14:49] that is a battery

[00:14:52] with capacity

[00:14:53] you have a stress level

[00:14:55] that you can work

[00:14:58] or function at least

[00:14:59] against the stress level

[00:15:01] when you go over there

[00:15:03] until it goes back under that stress level

[00:15:05] that is still healthy

[00:15:07] it is the period

[00:15:09] before you go over there

[00:15:11] to your stress level

[00:15:12] and then keep going

[00:15:14] then the capacity of your battery

[00:15:17] starts to decrease

[00:15:18] until it is almost legal

[00:15:20] and there

[00:15:22] on the point

[00:15:25] burnout and just being

[00:15:26] in need of time for yourself

[00:15:28] need a vacation

[00:15:29] or things that you really like

[00:15:33] at that moment

[00:15:34] it does not work

[00:15:35] so that is a point

[00:15:37] you need to sit under your stress level

[00:15:40] live

[00:15:42] and do nothing

[00:15:44] or do little

[00:15:47] of obligatory

[00:15:48] things that you think

[00:15:49] you have to do

[00:15:50] until that stress level

[00:15:54] that the battery can build up

[00:15:55] more capacity

[00:15:56] and it will be very sad

[00:16:00] and if you look at the distance

[00:16:03] so that you don't see each other

[00:16:05] then I feel that drive

[00:16:08] and that passion of yours

[00:16:09] I feel that dream

[00:16:10] to be in the world

[00:16:12] the enterprise architect

[00:16:14] with the digital architects

[00:16:16] I think there is a company

[00:16:18] that you still have to work

[00:16:20] you have the podcast

[00:16:23] you have the toastmasters

[00:16:27] you have to dive

[00:16:28] and I know that you are

[00:16:30] very eager to

[00:16:31] do a lot of new things

[00:16:40] how do you know

[00:16:41] I can say

[00:16:44] can you do nothing

[00:16:48] ?

[00:16:49] yes

[00:16:51] that is

[00:16:54] I know very well

[00:16:57] I can do nothing

[00:17:00] really

[00:17:02] nothing

[00:17:03] and you do it

[00:17:06] really

[00:17:06] would you like to stand up

[00:17:10] and do it first

[00:17:11] I don't know, jaunling

[00:17:13] or do you want to do it

[00:17:15] or do you take a walk

[00:17:15] and start your meal

[00:17:17] or do you have a certain

[00:17:21] ritual of starting a day

[00:17:24] ?

[00:17:27] not fast

[00:17:28] but

[00:17:30] I check in on it

[00:17:32] for example

[00:17:33] you mean your life

[00:17:35] yes

[00:17:36] so

[00:17:39] I start my morning

[00:17:40] I have a little time

[00:17:41] I challenge myself

[00:17:43] my GSM is out of my bedroom

[00:17:47] GSM

[00:17:48] is often out of space

[00:17:50] when I am working

[00:17:51] I try to lay down as much weight

[00:17:54] or when I watch TV

[00:17:56] I often have the pleasure

[00:17:57] to take my GSM

[00:17:58] because a TV movie is not fast enough

[00:18:01] for me

[00:18:02] it's not exciting enough

[00:18:04] so I lay down

[00:18:06] and watch TV

[00:18:10] but actually it's a very bad activity

[00:18:12] if you really

[00:18:14] watch nothing of Prickles

[00:18:15] and a single person is watching

[00:18:18] then I quickly get too much

[00:18:21] and sometimes

[00:18:22] sometimes I do it

[00:18:23] to do other things

[00:18:25] so if I have a day

[00:18:27] of today I need some rest

[00:18:31] then I will

[00:18:32] say it out loud

[00:18:34] plan

[00:18:35] that word planning

[00:18:37] but I will say it out loud

[00:18:39] that I need to get rid of

[00:18:42] and very often once a week

[00:18:44] I try to

[00:18:45] have a moment of peace

[00:18:47] so I reserve

[00:18:49] some evenings

[00:18:51] only for me

[00:18:52] and those are evenings

[00:18:56] where I can do

[00:18:57] what I feel at that moment

[00:18:59] what I feel

[00:19:00] I want to drink something with a friend

[00:19:02] or I want to do something

[00:19:04] or I want to lie in the toilet

[00:19:06] I want to read a book

[00:19:07] I want to draw

[00:19:10] everything is possible

[00:19:12] and there

[00:19:13] there is consciousness

[00:19:16] than a time before

[00:19:17] yes

[00:19:18] but that is really planned

[00:19:23] yes

[00:19:24] yes, that's good

[00:19:26] how?

[00:19:29] I'm looking forward to say something about it

[00:19:31] when

[00:19:33] because you're not afraid of

[00:19:39] falling into that period

[00:19:40] because you already made it

[00:19:41] you probably want to make it again

[00:19:43] because I feel something

[00:19:45] between the lines

[00:19:46] and then

[00:19:47] the work is not planned

[00:19:49] and that it can work

[00:19:51] and that combines

[00:19:52] with the feeling of responsibility

[00:19:55] and

[00:19:56] the feeling of duty

[00:19:57] that you love to say

[00:20:01] but rather than that

[00:20:02] of course

[00:20:03] that period has taught me

[00:20:07] the feeling of responsibility

[00:20:09] and the feeling of duty

[00:20:11] I don't want to say

[00:20:13] that I don't have anymore

[00:20:15] but for that

[00:20:17] the canvas that others

[00:20:19] put for me

[00:20:21] I sometimes get very much

[00:20:22] suffering

[00:20:23] but Elise always put

[00:20:25] that canvas much higher

[00:20:28] because you are such a strong

[00:20:30] drummer

[00:20:31] and there comes the ambition

[00:20:34] then you will analyze

[00:20:36] how can I come there

[00:20:38] or how can I do those things

[00:20:39] how can I do that project

[00:20:41] well done

[00:20:43] and my colleagues

[00:20:44] and now I think

[00:20:47] they know that

[00:20:48] we just give Elise a question

[00:20:50] a very vague one

[00:20:52] and she comes there

[00:20:53] because the canvas

[00:20:57] where I put it

[00:20:58] is always higher than the expectation of the other

[00:21:01] and do you know why

[00:21:02] the canvas is so high for yourself?

[00:21:04] I had fun

[00:21:08] I don't know

[00:21:09] I had fun

[00:21:10] to overachieve

[00:21:17] she is frustrated

[00:21:19] because I am frustrated

[00:21:22] and that is an act in my life

[00:21:26] I also think it is a bit of

[00:21:28] other than to be honest

[00:21:29] especially when the rap is made

[00:21:31] of we are going to repeat that music

[00:21:33] we will take that

[00:21:34] I go to the rehearsal

[00:21:37] and it is like

[00:21:38] I can't look at it

[00:21:40] or write a song

[00:21:41] but not in my head

[00:21:44] and they look at me

[00:21:46] and I play it completely from outside

[00:21:48] and for me it is also

[00:21:50] the canvas is high

[00:21:51] and I am

[00:21:53] I am a bit happy about myself

[00:21:55] I am frustrated and irritated

[00:21:58] because it doesn't go fast enough

[00:22:00] so I have a portion

[00:22:01] that is not even a portion

[00:22:02] and

[00:22:07] but

[00:22:09] why is it so high?

[00:22:11] I don't know

[00:22:13] for me personally

[00:22:14] I like to see

[00:22:15] what the limits are

[00:22:18] without putting my body out

[00:22:21] it is

[00:22:22] I am a sport

[00:22:24] and you say

[00:22:26] now I do 10 push ups

[00:22:28] and I want to see if I can do 20

[00:22:29] I

[00:22:31] enjoy

[00:22:33] not just

[00:22:34] but to sit in that

[00:22:38] and see how they are getting

[00:22:39] uncertain

[00:22:40] I don't know

[00:22:43] I am

[00:22:46] bored to be honest

[00:22:47] is that

[00:22:50] a similar game?

[00:22:51] maybe not

[00:22:52] because of the status quo

[00:22:55] I want to leave

[00:22:56] I

[00:22:57] at some point

[00:22:59] feel that

[00:23:00] I am in the growth zone

[00:23:03] the stretch zone

[00:23:05] I like to be in the comfort zone

[00:23:10] I am

[00:23:12] not in the comfort zone

[00:23:14] for me

[00:23:14] I live

[00:23:15] in my stretch zone

[00:23:18] last year

[00:23:19] I went to the stress zone

[00:23:22] to be there

[00:23:25] so I learned

[00:23:28] about

[00:23:29] my goals

[00:23:30] that I want to achieve

[00:23:32] I don't know

[00:23:33] I don't want to call myself a perfectionist

[00:23:34] but the goal I want to achieve

[00:23:37] is to see it as a moonshot

[00:23:40] if it is a shot to the moon

[00:23:42] that you want to go up

[00:23:43] a bit north star

[00:23:45] because

[00:23:47] if you get the top of the mountain

[00:23:50] then you think

[00:23:50] that you can go further

[00:23:52] the moon

[00:23:53] if it is there

[00:23:55] and

[00:23:59] it's ok

[00:24:00] if you don't go up to the moon

[00:24:01] but just before

[00:24:02] that you

[00:24:06] enjoy the journey

[00:24:07] I didn't know

[00:24:09] that I would break

[00:24:10] everyone in the musical

[00:24:12] and break in the sense

[00:24:14] that

[00:24:15] and still

[00:24:15] it has to be tighter

[00:24:17] it has to be a workout

[00:24:19] and for me it was a necessary

[00:24:21] and the workout was perfect

[00:24:24] and the day after that

[00:24:24] I learned

[00:24:25] that the journey

[00:24:30] is even better

[00:24:33] than the result

[00:24:34] because I can

[00:24:38] control the journey

[00:24:38] because that's fear

[00:24:39] but it doesn't have

[00:24:41] a self impact

[00:24:42] I can't control the result

[00:24:45] I can't decide how many people

[00:24:46] will clap because they are dancing

[00:24:47] I can't decide

[00:24:49] but I can decide

[00:24:52] if everyone is prepared

[00:24:53] we will have fun

[00:24:56] and the best of me

[00:24:57] I think that you have

[00:25:00] in your hand

[00:25:01] otherwise you will be frustrated

[00:25:05] for yourself

[00:25:07] that's good for a time

[00:25:11] I also have a time

[00:25:12] of being as follows

[00:25:14] and that was also a very

[00:25:17] perfectionist guitarist

[00:25:18] and I always say

[00:25:21] to that person

[00:25:24] nobody in public

[00:25:26] hears your mistakes

[00:25:27] in the middle

[00:25:29] the middle has alcohol

[00:25:31] then I'm still very good

[00:25:32] with the shooting

[00:25:34] and there is also nobody

[00:25:35] who will stand in public

[00:25:36] I'm not saying that the guitarist

[00:25:38] has played everything

[00:25:38] 100% right

[00:25:40] they will be famous

[00:25:42] or whatever you want to see

[00:25:45] so what is your goal

[00:25:47] with the performances

[00:25:49] now you have a very deep

[00:25:52] but I think that

[00:25:56] it's much earlier

[00:25:57] that it mainly made with

[00:25:59] the Italian of knowledge and technique

[00:26:01] that it was mainly a compensation

[00:26:03] because we didn't feel good enough

[00:26:04] and that I was looking for

[00:26:06] the extra validation

[00:26:07] applause of the musicians in public

[00:26:10] who indeed less than 1%

[00:26:12] of the audience made

[00:26:13] and that then very much

[00:26:15] could melodic minor

[00:26:18] and harmonic minor

[00:26:19] and Dorian and Fridgen

[00:26:21] and I know what I could

[00:26:22] detail for 3 over 2 months

[00:26:24] while the audience

[00:26:25] just

[00:26:27] heard something very simple

[00:26:29] and I also learned

[00:26:31] by listening to the pro's

[00:26:34] you serve the audience

[00:26:35] serve the song

[00:26:36] and then you serve yourself

[00:26:37] it's not about you

[00:26:39] and let go of that ego

[00:26:41] let go of that ego

[00:26:43] as if there was a movie with a little heart

[00:26:45] playing and you feel it

[00:26:47] you can't do it

[00:26:48] I can play simple things

[00:26:50] but you also find it because it touches

[00:26:52] see

[00:26:53] and

[00:26:55] yes

[00:26:57] I had to go through

[00:27:00] first of all

[00:27:01] the first piece

[00:27:04] I'm not a perfectionist

[00:27:06] but I am a striver

[00:27:07] I can't take it out

[00:27:09] I don't try to oversteer

[00:27:13] but under the apple tree

[00:27:15] I don't have a pair

[00:27:15] while I'm really not

[00:27:19] stimulating him to do it

[00:27:21] but you actually do

[00:27:22] a bit

[00:27:22] but striven

[00:27:25] if you hear striven

[00:27:26] that's a negative connotation

[00:27:29] but striven is about

[00:27:30] the word itself

[00:27:31] for me it's not

[00:27:34] that it might be seen

[00:27:36] as negative

[00:27:37] but for me it's really

[00:27:39] taking action

[00:27:41] and letting go

[00:27:42] of yourself

[00:27:44] for yourself

[00:27:50] that's something really nice

[00:27:51] that you want to limit yourself

[00:27:54] for me

[00:27:55] yes, a few years

[00:27:59] I

[00:28:02] accepted

[00:28:02] that's what's on my board

[00:28:04] I'm going to make the best of it

[00:28:06] and

[00:28:07] I also think that the chance is very small

[00:28:09] that I'll get a hair cut on my head

[00:28:11] so I think

[00:28:12] I can accept it better

[00:28:13] and make the best of it

[00:28:15] so that's a bit of self-acceptance

[00:28:18] that I didn't have

[00:28:19] in your life

[00:28:22] that was more in the background

[00:28:24] that's all that's easy to explain

[00:28:26] more than mask, but at the moment

[00:28:27] I don't want to be there

[00:28:31] so yes

[00:28:34] interesting

[00:28:34] do you consider yourself as an introvert personality

[00:28:37] or an extravert personality

[00:28:39] an ambivert

[00:28:41] what does that mean

[00:28:43] I know what it means

[00:28:44] for you

[00:28:45] for me, an ambivert is

[00:28:47] someone who depends on the context

[00:28:50] the situation

[00:28:51] and the person

[00:28:54] energy gets

[00:28:55] to be with others

[00:28:56] or not

[00:28:59] for me it can be very tiring

[00:29:01] to be in a big group

[00:29:03] where I

[00:29:04] don't feel really good

[00:29:07] then it can cost a lot of energy

[00:29:09] a completely new group

[00:29:11] where you're very busy

[00:29:12] to find your place

[00:29:13] I also find it very tiring

[00:29:15] so I'm lying on the introvert side

[00:29:19] I think

[00:29:20] on the other hand

[00:29:23] I can get a lot of energy

[00:29:24] from

[00:29:25] contact with some people

[00:29:27] how is a deep conversation

[00:29:30] or a certain friend who has seen

[00:29:33] my partner

[00:29:34] for example

[00:29:35] I get a lot of energy

[00:29:38] also

[00:29:39] I think if I was

[00:29:42] introvert personality

[00:29:44] then it is

[00:29:46] that

[00:29:46] that conflates what I have

[00:29:50] because I always

[00:29:51] like to bring people together

[00:29:52] and I also find it cool

[00:29:56] when I bring a group of people

[00:29:57] that it's cool, that it's busy

[00:29:59] that it's fun

[00:30:00] and then I get a lot of energy

[00:30:03] from it, I can't sleep

[00:30:04] even if it's evening

[00:30:06] and then I think

[00:30:10] that doesn't belong

[00:30:12] in the introvert side

[00:30:13] I don't think that's as hard

[00:30:15] as it is

[00:30:16] but I already know that

[00:30:19] I'm not a good group

[00:30:20] I don't think that's cool

[00:30:27] I think

[00:30:28] that it's cool to be alone

[00:30:30] but

[00:30:32] I don't even know if you're alone

[00:30:34] because there is

[00:30:35] that I didn't use

[00:30:38] an excuse to do something

[00:30:41] and the next introvert

[00:30:42] always talks about it, I can't

[00:30:44] but I listen

[00:30:45] I ask him questions

[00:30:49] and in introvert

[00:30:50] he says

[00:30:50] I don't do that

[00:30:53] because I'm introvert

[00:30:58] if it's your choice

[00:31:02] or your responsibility

[00:31:03] I also think that you deserve the consequences

[00:31:05] or you didn't deserve the consequences

[00:31:08] do you understand?

[00:31:09] you have a dream of being busy

[00:31:13] I mean, when you're an entrepreneur

[00:31:16] you don't want to contact a customer

[00:31:20] then I think

[00:31:21] I understand that

[00:31:21] but I don't know how you're going to do it

[00:31:26] because at the end of the day

[00:31:27] you have to be independent

[00:31:28] of course

[00:31:33] but you can approach an introvert

[00:31:37] who has learned

[00:31:38] in public speaking

[00:31:40] a new world

[00:31:41] because he's introvert

[00:31:44] you can approach him

[00:31:45] when he's just

[00:31:49] in a comfort zone

[00:31:50] you're the only one

[00:31:52] who wants to stay in a comfort zone

[00:31:54] first of all

[00:31:55] when you're with that person

[00:31:56] who you could ask

[00:31:59] you don't want to

[00:32:00] live in those stretch zones

[00:32:04] if you want to

[00:32:05] then you can stay in a comfort zone

[00:32:07] but that's probably the first thing

[00:32:09] that you could learn

[00:32:11] most people are there

[00:32:13] most people are there

[00:32:14] most of them are in a comfort zone

[00:32:19] and in their

[00:32:21] stretch zone

[00:32:23] which I see a lot

[00:32:25] there are a lot of people

[00:32:27] who are waking up

[00:32:29] precisely

[00:32:29] and in their stretch

[00:32:32] zones they start to live

[00:32:34] oh yeah

[00:32:35] how do you notice that?

[00:32:40] is that the context

[00:32:42] what I'm seeing

[00:32:43] I notice that

[00:32:45] I've talked to a lot of people

[00:32:46] with friends and people around me

[00:32:48] and you're also a person

[00:32:49] with a common sense

[00:32:51] people who meet there

[00:32:53] who are working hard

[00:32:56] to develop themselves

[00:32:57] so they don't sit in a comfort zone

[00:33:00] they're just looking for

[00:33:02] stretch zones

[00:33:03] you call it self leadership

[00:33:05] self lead

[00:33:08] a black jampol

[00:33:09] Jean-Paul Sartre was a long time ago

[00:33:10] he was a Mark Manson

[00:33:13] in a book

[00:33:14] The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck

[00:33:17] and he had

[00:33:19] a video

[00:33:21] with me

[00:33:23] one of them

[00:33:23] had a quote by Jean-Paul Sartre

[00:33:25] a philosopher

[00:33:26] who used it in his own context

[00:33:29] what he said

[00:33:33] you are responsible

[00:33:34] for your own experience

[00:33:35] but you're not

[00:33:37] a false person

[00:33:37] I find it

[00:33:41] interesting

[00:33:43] and that means

[00:33:45] the more responsibility

[00:33:46] you take in your life

[00:33:47] you partner

[00:33:50] you stop

[00:33:51] you're going to fall

[00:33:53] and you come back

[00:33:55] you have two choices

[00:33:59] you stay in the box

[00:34:00] in the Calimero

[00:34:02] and there's a lot of time

[00:34:03] to talk about that

[00:34:04] and then maybe some lessons

[00:34:07] and the next step

[00:34:09] is what I learned

[00:34:10] maybe you don't have enough limits

[00:34:13] maybe you didn't get enough for yourself

[00:34:16] see

[00:34:18] and that doesn't mean

[00:34:20] that means

[00:34:20] that you can practice

[00:34:21] so if you feel a conversation

[00:34:23] where people are suffering from limits

[00:34:27] then it's like

[00:34:28] sorry but that's a projection

[00:34:30] of that thing

[00:34:32] that's for you, that's not for me

[00:34:34] in a respectful way

[00:34:36] of course

[00:34:37] and

[00:34:40] I

[00:34:42] find myself

[00:34:43] an important and honest

[00:34:45] and the more responsibility you take

[00:34:47] the more

[00:34:48] the more positive

[00:34:55] you become

[00:34:56] the more you get

[00:34:59] a real person

[00:35:00] and

[00:35:02] and

[00:35:03] and the more

[00:35:07] you yourself

[00:35:08] you create that dream

[00:35:10] what you want

[00:35:13] and

[00:35:15] because there's always an excuse

[00:35:16] to not do anything

[00:35:18] or why it's so

[00:35:19] that's why I say

[00:35:23] a lot of problems

[00:35:24] with people who have a problem

[00:35:27] that's a problem

[00:35:29] yes

[00:35:29] you know

[00:35:31] I can make excuses with problems

[00:35:33] but

[00:35:34] if you see it and you understand

[00:35:36] a problem comes

[00:35:37] and a solution is presented

[00:35:40] and that's what I create

[00:35:43] that's a problem

[00:35:44] and I used to have the possibility

[00:35:45] to solve that problem

[00:35:47] and then big people live

[00:35:49] they don't have anything to do with it

[00:35:50] and

[00:35:51] I find myself a very important

[00:35:53] but it's not something I was

[00:35:55] responsible for

[00:35:57] that person

[00:36:00] growing

[00:36:00] I could never

[00:36:03] say

[00:36:05] that's something I

[00:36:07] know for the last 10 years

[00:36:09] before

[00:36:10] and to make that with the internet

[00:36:13] in Youtube, that was cat videos

[00:36:16] but that was

[00:36:18] still a bit

[00:36:19] there is

[00:36:21] the top one

[00:36:23] most of the videos on Youtube are

[00:36:25] educational

[00:36:26] I mean

[00:36:29] I find it very educational

[00:36:31] on

[00:36:34] Youtube

[00:36:35] the 2009

[00:36:37] cat videos

[00:36:39] not that there was no access

[00:36:41] to that kind of information

[00:36:43] but you say it yourself

[00:36:45] and you have friends

[00:36:45] and I don't know

[00:36:46] who was working with that

[00:36:49] that was a very classical study

[00:36:52] at school

[00:36:54] my other students in the job

[00:36:55] or they got courses on work

[00:36:57] and then I thought

[00:36:59] I will learn

[00:37:02] how to get a job

[00:37:03] and now I think

[00:37:05] you have to work harder

[00:37:07] than in a job

[00:37:10] I didn't say that

[00:37:11] Jim Rohn said that

[00:37:13] and

[00:37:14] I find it very important

[00:37:16] because if you do that

[00:37:17] you will be valuable for your work

[00:37:20] and you will be better

[00:37:21] and you can

[00:37:22] control your own life

[00:37:25] if you want to create

[00:37:27] you can't control everything

[00:37:29] that is not feasible

[00:37:32] or if everything is feasible

[00:37:37] I don't know

[00:37:39] maybe

[00:37:41] I think that is

[00:37:44] feasible

[00:37:45] but

[00:37:47] the reason why

[00:37:48] the one I heard in the previous podcast

[00:37:53] is

[00:37:54] that it comes out of yourself

[00:37:57] what was always there

[00:37:59] Expressive because you are an CEO

[00:38:01] Expressive because you are in your own

[00:38:02] indeed

[00:38:03] that

[00:38:05] something

[00:38:07] that you

[00:38:08] can make

[00:38:10] where everyone

[00:38:12] really feels that it is worth

[00:38:14] to make

[00:38:15] can do everything

[00:38:18] because that is also a few times said

[00:38:20] you can work very hard

[00:38:21] to build a house

[00:38:23] and that you can hear a lot

[00:38:26] but one thing

[00:38:27] that is actually the top of

[00:38:28] that is your moonshot

[00:38:29] that is the top of your mountain

[00:38:30] and if you

[00:38:33] stay on top of a mountain

[00:38:35] can be a very beautiful view

[00:38:37] but that view will also fail

[00:38:40] I am someone

[00:38:41] even if I reach the top of your mountain

[00:38:44] then I say

[00:38:45] there is also a beautiful mountain

[00:38:46] how would the view be from there

[00:38:49] and I keep my backpack

[00:38:53] actually

[00:38:55] so makeable

[00:38:56] go

[00:38:58] I think you have said a lot

[00:39:00] now

[00:39:01] but it is very interesting

[00:39:04] because

[00:39:04] many people say

[00:39:06] what do I want from life

[00:39:10] what do I want from life

[00:39:12] and what he says

[00:39:14] what do you want from me

[00:39:16] otherwise he says that he wants to

[00:39:18] come to express

[00:39:18] and I find it very interesting

[00:39:21] to see your energy

[00:39:24] and your makeable

[00:39:25] to see it

[00:39:26] because if you are busy

[00:39:29] you want to come to express

[00:39:30] but you have to do action

[00:39:31] to discover

[00:39:36] what is there in a Kalamal

[00:39:38] because it is not like

[00:39:40] there is a Timmerman

[00:39:41] and a Coruir

[00:39:42] it is not like that

[00:39:44] it is meant as much subtler

[00:39:46] and as much more undefined

[00:39:48] more than what we hear

[00:39:50] and I think that is

[00:39:55] and there are things

[00:39:58] and as a result

[00:40:00] I find it very interesting

[00:40:02] but as a result

[00:40:03] when I get in contact with people

[00:40:05] and I believe that very hard

[00:40:10] yesterday evening

[00:40:11] there was a podcast live with Isabelle Dumourtier

[00:40:13] and it was

[00:40:14] but

[00:40:15] I think that we were with 10

[00:40:18] because it was quite exceptional

[00:40:20] but you feel

[00:40:22] those 10 people

[00:40:25] who came from different

[00:40:26] companies

[00:40:27] from different lives

[00:40:29] were all looking for that

[00:40:31] for the teaching of

[00:40:33] I am doing this for the outside world

[00:40:36] successful

[00:40:36] and I feel that this is not

[00:40:39] but I dare to go somewhere

[00:40:41] it was a shame

[00:40:43] because I did not dare to go

[00:40:47] or I can not go back to my mother

[00:40:49] or my environment

[00:40:52] I feel that I want to do something else

[00:40:55] and there was that one time

[00:40:57] and I will not name her name

[00:40:59] and she had a few weeks

[00:41:01] and I saw her at an AI event

[00:41:04] and she talked about it

[00:41:06] that I will be there next week

[00:41:07] after that time

[00:41:08] I will say that I will be completely different

[00:41:10] I will not talk about her name

[00:41:11] and about

[00:41:12] I can not say anything

[00:41:15] but that is a very different part

[00:41:17] and yes, it is that I will come

[00:41:19] and she was indeed yesterday

[00:41:22] because I was a little scared

[00:41:23] and she was looking for it

[00:41:26] and I think that is an important thing

[00:41:27] to go to the library

[00:41:30] to look for people

[00:41:32] instead of the youth books

[00:41:33] because they are a little bit like

[00:41:35] they always look like

[00:41:38] that stuff you read

[00:41:40] and you want to do a lot

[00:41:42] but you should not do two things

[00:41:45] or just do one thing

[00:41:47] and listen to it live

[00:41:48] especially if they have to say that to me

[00:41:50] and sometimes they say that to me

[00:41:52] I feel like I am asking

[00:41:54] I can not do that anymore

[00:41:55] I do not have to ask for

[00:41:57] the business development stuff

[00:42:00] to do for Oiko

[00:42:01] I have already left that

[00:42:02] because it is too much

[00:42:05] or only to play podcasts

[00:42:07] or only music

[00:42:09] that

[00:42:10] I want all of them

[00:42:12] you understand

[00:42:13] and although not continuously 24 hours a day

[00:42:17] but that is something

[00:42:18] that I feel that I do not want one thing

[00:42:21] that continuously

[00:42:22] something like that

[00:42:23] but there are trade-offs

[00:42:26] for example I have no TV

[00:42:28] or almost no

[00:42:29] and as you have already seen

[00:42:31] there are some friends

[00:42:33] who are not so friendly

[00:42:34] of certain choices

[00:42:35] because sometimes I feel

[00:42:38] sorry but I can find a network event

[00:42:40] and now I really have to be at home

[00:42:41] because it is too much

[00:42:42] so that is what the price

[00:42:45] I do not think

[00:42:48] because it is always

[00:42:51] in the mountains

[00:42:52] and others remain as quiet

[00:42:54] on the Nenem Berg

[00:42:55] and

[00:42:56] how do you move my cheese

[00:42:58] I can not

[00:42:59] I can not follow it anymore

[00:43:03] that is about mice

[00:43:05] and they are looking for a case

[00:43:07] and the Nenem mouse

[00:43:09] remains the same case on the other

[00:43:11] I thought there was no other case

[00:43:14] and then it is already

[00:43:15] gone

[00:43:15] and then the Nen

[00:43:20] stays and the case

[00:43:21] starts to stink and rot

[00:43:24] and the others do not

[00:43:26] they have been thinking

[00:43:27] for so long that they think

[00:43:28] the Nen comes back

[00:43:30] and you cannot

[00:43:32] with the case, no

[00:43:33] it remains

[00:43:34] it changes

[00:43:36] I can see

[00:43:40] a picture

[00:43:43] of the mice

[00:43:45] or is it mice

[00:43:47] and there is a spring

[00:43:48] playing music

[00:43:49] in the summer

[00:43:51] and the mice are eating

[00:43:53] to bring a tree

[00:43:55] and the mice

[00:43:59] are watching

[00:44:00] where they are playing

[00:44:01] but we also have to

[00:44:03] make sure that there will be winter

[00:44:07] no problem

[00:44:09] then it is winter

[00:44:10] and the mice are in the house

[00:44:13] with their hearts

[00:44:13] eating

[00:44:14] and the spring

[00:44:16] is in the house

[00:44:18] and that is

[00:44:20] for me

[00:44:20] the point

[00:44:24] that p.s. Grown

[00:44:25] is to grow

[00:44:26] and he forgot

[00:44:28] a tree, do not ask him

[00:44:30] stop growing

[00:44:31] I think

[00:44:36] when you grow

[00:44:38] then you always

[00:44:39] will say

[00:44:40] you will always be angry

[00:44:43] because if you

[00:44:45] reach your beard

[00:44:45] you will grow a bigger beard

[00:44:47] you will have more hair

[00:44:49] you can do that

[00:44:52] I am now trying

[00:44:54] to live as much as possible

[00:44:55] with my truth

[00:44:56] to live with my truth

[00:44:59] so

[00:45:01] I am talking about

[00:45:04] young, ambitious people

[00:45:05] who are building a career

[00:45:06] and then think

[00:45:07] is it now

[00:45:10] without

[00:45:10] making a big story

[00:45:12] to make

[00:45:14] I think

[00:45:16] that you then

[00:45:19] sometimes lie

[00:45:20] that you want a certain career

[00:45:22] and a certain image

[00:45:24] starts to build around you

[00:45:26] about who you are

[00:45:27] do you want friendship with someone

[00:45:30] do you say something to

[00:45:31] do you feel you need

[00:45:34] to have a friendship with a certain person

[00:45:37] then you will do a lot

[00:45:38] to have that friendship

[00:45:40] do you want to reach a certain career

[00:45:43] then you will try

[00:45:45] to convince others

[00:45:45] that you are worth it

[00:45:48] and maybe

[00:45:50] you yourself do not believe

[00:45:51] but get rid of it

[00:45:53] convince others

[00:45:56] and then you will start

[00:45:58] doing things

[00:45:59] or tell yourself

[00:46:01] or put energy in things

[00:46:03] that you do not give

[00:46:05] but others see it

[00:46:07] so they think

[00:46:08] that is a person

[00:46:10] who has a certain career

[00:46:13] or is always ready

[00:46:15] to let friends down

[00:46:18] while that may

[00:46:19] not really worth

[00:46:21] you are actually other people

[00:46:22] who are looking for an image

[00:46:24] to build

[00:46:27] that is not your truth

[00:46:30] what I

[00:46:31] decide to do

[00:46:34] but others will expect

[00:46:37] that you are like that

[00:46:39] and the more you live

[00:46:40] your own truth

[00:46:42] the more you

[00:46:44] will be content

[00:46:46] with what you do

[00:46:47] the more other people will see

[00:46:49] who you are

[00:46:51] and the more you

[00:46:53] in your

[00:46:56] purpose

[00:46:57] in your purpose

[00:46:58] authentic self

[00:46:59] I am behind you

[00:47:01] I am looking for the words

[00:47:04] that does not matter

[00:47:06] they are just words

[00:47:07] but I believe that

[00:47:09] I think that

[00:47:11] they do not

[00:47:16] they do not

[00:47:18] to be open

[00:47:18] they do that

[00:47:20] because they are not aware

[00:47:23] of the reason

[00:47:24] that they can

[00:47:25] or that is needed

[00:47:27] because they think that they will make it

[00:47:30] because it is a certain

[00:47:32] feeling of their giving

[00:47:34] that can be very heavy

[00:47:35] but something full of feeling

[00:47:37] when you think I am going to do

[00:47:39] I am going to feel good, I am going to feel successful

[00:47:40] whatever the term does

[00:47:42] I feel very good

[00:47:45] with the going up

[00:47:48] in combination

[00:47:49] with example

[00:47:51] that

[00:47:52] the external validation

[00:47:54] what I just want to say

[00:47:56] then you know my opinion

[00:47:58] you fit in

[00:48:01] is that a certain group

[00:48:03] of friends

[00:48:04] who do that

[00:48:07] you listen to that

[00:48:08] because it is interesting

[00:48:10] that we have

[00:48:11] that you want to listen to a certain tribe

[00:48:14] but if someone chooses

[00:48:16] that example

[00:48:17] you want to say

[00:48:18] I really want to be with that group

[00:48:20] or with that person

[00:48:22] and you come

[00:48:24] behind that, you keep on

[00:48:26] you have a high level of evidence

[00:48:28] to take an extreme example

[00:48:31] but you say to that person

[00:48:34] you also do rock climbing

[00:48:35] I also think that

[00:48:37] you start rock climbing

[00:48:39] and every time

[00:48:40] you are stressed

[00:48:41] because you are too happy

[00:48:43] that you are not made to climb

[00:48:46] because you have no joy

[00:48:47] but actually because you think

[00:48:48] I want to be friends with that person

[00:48:50] you lie to that person a little

[00:48:52] because to say I like climbing

[00:48:54] and let's do that together

[00:48:56] you build a friendship with that person

[00:48:58] and what does that person look like

[00:49:00] you put your front on a whole group of friends

[00:49:01] who all connect

[00:49:04] with each other because you like climbing

[00:49:06] and yes, there you are

[00:49:08] then you go into a world of climbing

[00:49:10] because you don't like climbing

[00:49:12] you do

[00:49:13] it is not bad

[00:49:17] I don't think so

[00:49:19] because of that

[00:49:21] but sometimes it is a bit

[00:49:24] learn, feel

[00:49:24] actually I don't really like this

[00:49:28] sometimes you lie

[00:49:29] in front of yourself as a different person

[00:49:31] and then you actually

[00:49:33] in certain ways

[00:49:34] that you live

[00:49:37] because you

[00:49:38] have felt very early on

[00:49:40] this is not it

[00:49:41] but don't you think it sounds like it's not heard

[00:49:44] and I am also someone

[00:49:45] who is very good at negating

[00:49:47] the signals

[00:49:48] oh but I also

[00:49:49] we are in third, we are already working

[00:49:56] thank you

[00:49:57] but seriously

[00:49:59] third

[00:50:00] you can have a drink

[00:50:02] but you also have a drink

[00:50:04] and you don't have to drink alcohol

[00:50:07] but

[00:50:08] I look at it now

[00:50:10] yes

[00:50:13] yes, for me

[00:50:14] it comes

[00:50:16] 10, 10, 12 years later

[00:50:19] you understand

[00:50:20] you know what that is 10 years

[00:50:22] so

[00:50:24] that's what I think

[00:50:25] that's good, that's ideal

[00:50:27] I mean

[00:50:28] what I think

[00:50:30] what Frisj Wonna had told you

[00:50:33] how long

[00:50:34] that period

[00:50:35] that you are getting older

[00:50:39] how big the distance

[00:50:41] becomes

[00:50:41] with the following time you need

[00:50:44] to

[00:50:46] return

[00:50:47] to

[00:50:49] get closer to yourself

[00:50:52] so you have the fastest

[00:50:54] that's good

[00:50:55] but you are still waiting for 10 years

[00:50:58] is that

[00:50:59] still the

[00:51:02] healing process

[00:51:02] or the journey, whatever you call it

[00:51:05] that will be even more intense and bigger

[00:51:09] I don't think so

[00:51:11] not per se

[00:51:14] I can decide tomorrow

[00:51:16] that I don't want to be an enterprise architect

[00:51:18] or I can decide tomorrow

[00:51:19] that I don't want to be associated

[00:51:22] with public speaking

[00:51:23] and never do that again

[00:51:24] I know that's because you are 31

[00:51:26] but

[00:51:26] I think that

[00:51:29] when you are 41

[00:51:31] you have already made

[00:51:34] your own proof that this is your life

[00:51:36] and that's how the games are

[00:51:38] that role is like that

[00:51:40] you need to consider

[00:51:41] that for many people, that role, that title

[00:51:44] that enterprise architect

[00:51:45] you have a different thing

[00:51:47] that it's a simple

[00:51:49] that it's also an identity

[00:51:51] CEO or something

[00:51:53] take that off, it's nothing more

[00:51:56] understand

[00:51:56] so normally that you

[00:51:58] that takes a long time

[00:52:00] it's much harder

[00:52:02] and I think that it will be more difficult

[00:52:05] for that to be lost

[00:52:06] that I have understood that

[00:52:08] I am not an enterprise architect

[00:52:10] I will do something else

[00:52:13] that I see that

[00:52:15] because you have done that

[00:52:17] that you can know about it

[00:52:19] and that you are even detached

[00:52:21] but that also comes because

[00:52:22] that you became a slave

[00:52:24] and that you made it

[00:52:26] and that you are

[00:52:29] testing from other skills

[00:52:30] like Toastmasters

[00:52:32] Public speaking, that's the biggest

[00:52:35] fear of many people

[00:52:37] Elise does that for her fun

[00:52:38] but you have to do it

[00:52:40] no?

[00:52:41] I say that with the podcast

[00:52:43] but you can do it

[00:52:44] you have to do it and keep going

[00:52:48] no?

[00:52:50] because that's the point

[00:52:51] because it is difficult

[00:52:53] so yes, so you create

[00:52:56] but what can you

[00:52:58] mean

[00:53:00] it's not that

[00:53:02] I see many 40 plusters

[00:53:04] who are in the button

[00:53:06] with themselves

[00:53:06] because that is

[00:53:08] a whole wave around

[00:53:09] a family, children

[00:53:13] hobbies

[00:53:14] and work and keep a core

[00:53:16] that financial implications

[00:53:18] with them

[00:53:18] I heard it yesterday

[00:53:22] someone say

[00:53:24] Jan Dien is still there

[00:53:26] I say keep a core

[00:53:28] there is a BME

[00:53:29] I don't know

[00:53:33] you are still a judge

[00:53:35] you are still alive

[00:53:36] don't care

[00:53:38] I think it's great that you realize that

[00:53:41] the more you believe

[00:53:42] that it is in your life

[00:53:44] the harder you believe

[00:53:47] the harder it is

[00:53:48] so

[00:53:51] the harder you believe

[00:53:52] I am a real BME

[00:53:54] you are not real, that's a car

[00:53:56] you can't be real

[00:53:57] you can't be real

[00:53:58] but you hear Elise

[00:53:59] Elise, yes

[00:54:00] I will show you the field

[00:54:03] look what I am going to do

[00:54:04] I am a boy

[00:54:06] I am alone, I started with those cars

[00:54:09] I think that will happen

[00:54:12] where are they Elise

[00:54:14] I will stop

[00:54:18] I will book a plane

[00:54:21] ticket to this weekend

[00:54:23] from Narrages Cambodja

[00:54:25] I think that

[00:54:27] that everyone is a path

[00:54:29] and that everyone

[00:54:30] is a tallore, a board

[00:54:32] and that it is not in us

[00:54:34] to say that because of the process

[00:54:35] to convince people

[00:54:36] that it is your thing, you have to do it

[00:54:41] it's your life

[00:54:45] it is a very important

[00:54:47] it is a

[00:54:49] important being

[00:54:50] that I can share or aim

[00:54:53] that everyone wants

[00:54:55] to do it freely

[00:54:57] or to decide

[00:54:59] whether he wants to be a person

[00:55:02] do you think that your friends

[00:55:05] have changed

[00:55:07] by that?

[00:55:09] I am currently

[00:55:10] in a transition

[00:55:12] I think

[00:55:14] I had a few young friends

[00:55:16] who I thought I had stuck

[00:55:18] but what I did not completely

[00:55:20] I was with them

[00:55:21] where I said

[00:55:22] I sometimes have to lie

[00:55:25] with good intentions

[00:55:27] but I lied to myself

[00:55:29] that I like to

[00:55:31] keep parties, I like to go to the dancing

[00:55:33] and so on

[00:55:35] I like to dance

[00:55:35] but actually

[00:55:38] go out in the entertainment

[00:55:39] and then with cocktails

[00:55:42] and where it is too much pressure

[00:55:44] where the floor is

[00:55:46] I actually don't like that

[00:55:48] I like to dance at home

[00:55:50] I like to

[00:55:52] do salsa or something

[00:55:53] and those friends, for example

[00:55:55] we often went out and dance

[00:55:58] and I did that with them

[00:55:59] and I did how you liked it

[00:56:01] and I believe that at that moment

[00:56:03] really do

[00:56:03] and now I notice

[00:56:06] that you are beginning to have

[00:56:08] other norms

[00:56:09] and that you feel

[00:56:13] I still think that is a very cool person

[00:56:16] but maybe

[00:56:17] you no longer have that in your life

[00:56:19] and then I have the trouble

[00:56:21] to let it go again

[00:56:22] and I am currently

[00:56:23] going to write a letter to me

[00:56:27] about friendship

[00:56:28] that I will ask

[00:56:30] what friendship is for me

[00:56:32] and

[00:56:35] I think that friends

[00:56:37] that it also comes and goes

[00:56:38] but I also have a friend

[00:56:41] who has always stayed

[00:56:42] since my 9 years

[00:56:45] and at some point

[00:56:46] she started saying that you are my sister

[00:56:49] and

[00:56:49] online she really had a great

[00:56:52] impression of her

[00:56:53] I would actually want a friendship

[00:56:55] like you with Lise

[00:56:58] and she just answered

[00:57:00] you shouldn't expect

[00:57:02] life, that is

[00:57:03] so unique that friendship

[00:57:06] that you can

[00:57:08] expect the same

[00:57:09] that you can find

[00:57:12] that in the summer

[00:57:12] and

[00:57:14] then she made me a little bit more awake

[00:57:16] because I expected that friendship

[00:57:18] I expected the same

[00:57:21] from all other people

[00:57:22] where I felt friendship

[00:57:24] so I thought everyone should

[00:57:26] actually fulfill that impossible

[00:57:29] relationship

[00:57:29] while I

[00:57:31] have my nephew

[00:57:33] who is against me

[00:57:34] and I have a new Lise

[00:57:36] you have friends

[00:57:37] in different relationships

[00:57:40] with different people

[00:57:41] who are built differently

[00:57:43] and you have friends to do

[00:57:44] certain sports with

[00:57:45] there was an example of honour

[00:57:47] with that link to the climate

[00:57:49] but you have friends

[00:57:51] where you can see

[00:57:52] what you can see

[00:57:53] and who you can do that

[00:57:55] and that you can also laugh

[00:57:57] and you can share

[00:57:59] so you have

[00:58:01] different people to share

[00:58:03] we don't have to

[00:58:04] share everything

[00:58:07] yes, that's right

[00:58:09] not everyone has to

[00:58:12] share everything

[00:58:13] yes, of course

[00:58:15] because I play music

[00:58:17] and I play a lot

[00:58:18] so the people I see

[00:58:21] they have to be in a certain friendship

[00:58:23] but it happens often

[00:58:24] when the music stops

[00:58:27] it's gone

[00:58:28] and that sounds very strange

[00:58:29] and there is nothing wrong

[00:58:31] with that, I'll go back to that

[00:58:33] but it's the mayonnaise

[00:58:34] the music that makes

[00:58:36] that you train before and after

[00:58:39] that you are together

[00:58:40] and that you laugh

[00:58:42] and you have that

[00:58:46] sometimes

[00:58:47] I learned that sometimes

[00:58:50] even with a few colleagues

[00:58:51] you can be very friendly

[00:58:53] and that's what you have

[00:58:55] and sometimes more

[00:58:57] difficult periods

[00:58:58] than with your own friends

[00:59:01] who are also busy with their life

[00:59:03] especially if there is a family

[00:59:05] with a different state

[00:59:06] and that's another

[00:59:10] thing

[00:59:11] do you read a lot?

[00:59:15] I try

[00:59:16] when you are reading

[00:59:19] I often have

[00:59:24] three books

[00:59:25] that I'm reading

[00:59:26] right now

[00:59:29] I'm not active

[00:59:31] when I'm reading a book

[00:59:32] and you have one or two books

[00:59:34] that you like

[00:59:35] that I really like

[00:59:37] super

[00:59:38] yes

[00:59:40] in my period

[00:59:41] last year

[00:59:42] I read six months

[00:59:44] I read a book

[00:59:46] the happiness project

[00:59:49] by Gretchen Rubin

[00:59:52] that's someone

[00:59:53] who is very dramatic

[00:59:56] and who is

[00:59:59] going on for a year

[00:59:59] he goes to test six things

[01:00:03] that would increase happiness

[01:00:06] he has seen two children

[01:00:08] and he has

[01:00:10] his whole life

[01:00:11] every month

[01:00:13] four or six points

[01:00:15] and

[01:00:18] that's very interesting

[01:00:19] to read

[01:00:20] I think there are a lot of insights

[01:00:24] like that

[01:00:28] there are two things

[01:00:29] that I'm thinking about

[01:00:30] maybe some stupid things

[01:00:33] one was

[01:00:35] that I didn't expect

[01:00:36] one minute cleanup

[01:00:38] so my

[01:00:39] I try to do it

[01:00:41] if you have something

[01:00:42] at home

[01:00:43] it takes less than a minute

[01:00:48] to clean it up

[01:00:49] in that year it does

[01:00:52] that's how

[01:00:53] for example she would control her house

[01:00:54] and at a certain moment

[01:00:57] the one minute cleanup

[01:01:01] or

[01:01:02] to do it yourself

[01:01:02] every ten minutes

[01:01:04] every evening

[01:01:06] and that's where they would get some happiness

[01:01:08] and

[01:01:10] something else was

[01:01:11] to read stories of people who have it less good than yourself

[01:01:14] that's very weird

[01:01:16] but that's obviously psychological

[01:01:18] that you know

[01:01:19] some things that can happen

[01:01:21] that you suddenly

[01:01:24] because of this weird reason

[01:01:26] feel much more grateful

[01:01:28] about

[01:01:30] what you actually have

[01:01:31] but that's

[01:01:34] only two things

[01:01:36] I'm actually planning to

[01:01:38] read a book now

[01:01:39] because it's so

[01:01:41] impactful

[01:01:42] and I've also read Flo recently

[01:01:46] with Jan Bonbray

[01:01:48] that can

[01:01:50] that flower book

[01:01:53] with those ears

[01:01:54] no

[01:01:56] a book about Flo

[01:01:58] and

[01:01:58] I don't think

[01:02:01] Jan Bonbray

[01:02:02] it's called just Flo

[01:02:04] it's about the

[01:02:05] optimal experience

[01:02:08] about the status

[01:02:10] Flo that you can reach

[01:02:12] but it's actually

[01:02:14] a scientist

[01:02:15] a psychologist scientist

[01:02:17] Samihali Cheksemihae

[01:02:19] who died a few years ago

[01:02:21] and based on Jan Bonbray

[01:02:23] what's the basis of that?

[01:02:26] it was really

[01:02:29] I also appreciate

[01:02:30] those kind of books

[01:02:32] because they are someone who lives with a topic

[01:02:34] very obsessive

[01:02:37] and that

[01:02:38] all that knowledge

[01:02:39] in a reasonable way

[01:02:42] in a book

[01:02:43] then I think

[01:02:44] that's a book worth reading

[01:02:47] because you have a whole life

[01:02:49] you read

[01:02:50] in one book

[01:02:51] I really thought so

[01:02:55] for me

[01:02:57] that book was made by

[01:02:58] Jan Bonbray

[01:02:59] I'm going to give him a bit

[01:03:00] I'm going to put it on

[01:03:02] you think

[01:03:06] that starts with the topic

[01:03:08] that's the status of the topic

[01:03:09] I find it very interesting

[01:03:11] that is of course mental

[01:03:13] but then it starts to experience

[01:03:15] the flow

[01:03:16] and that's so

[01:03:19] it's not something you can think of

[01:03:21] that you feel

[01:03:21] but you don't know when it's in the resistance

[01:03:23] because the dance is being danced

[01:03:27] for me that was a sign

[01:03:29] as a child

[01:03:31] so that means

[01:03:32] that you can take one minute

[01:03:33] and then say 5 hours further

[01:03:36] and think

[01:03:36] what's the time?

[01:03:38] and also if you stop

[01:03:40] and then look up from your sheet

[01:03:41] that you suddenly

[01:03:45] that's the time

[01:03:46] that you feel tired

[01:03:46] I didn't eat

[01:03:48] I didn't think of anything else

[01:03:50] than this statement

[01:03:52] that you suddenly feel

[01:03:55] like oh

[01:03:57] I have to lie

[01:03:59] that is

[01:04:01] yes

[01:04:04] we went to Antwerp

[01:04:06] we came here

[01:04:08] 8 years ago

[01:04:09] what are you going to say

[01:04:10] and not of

[01:04:12] everything you've done

[01:04:14] what I'm saying

[01:04:16] what it does

[01:04:24] I'm there for you

[01:04:26] and I love you

[01:04:27] but I'm always there

[01:04:34] damn that's a very nice day

[01:04:37] you thought about it

[01:04:38] I knew you would like that

[01:04:43] you're already bored

[01:04:45] because I thought

[01:04:45] I'm going to ask

[01:04:45] I really realized that

[01:04:51] I learned that recently

[01:04:53] and that was

[01:04:57] that's

[01:04:58] that's metae

[01:04:58] that's almost spiritual

[01:05:01] I think

[01:05:02] I did meditation

[01:05:05] where you

[01:05:07] as a child

[01:05:08] in a

[01:05:09] in a difficult situation

[01:05:12] and that you as a grown-up

[01:05:14] person

[01:05:16] sitting next to that child

[01:05:18] and there you said

[01:05:19] that child, you're consoling

[01:05:20] I made a moment

[01:05:22] when my parents didn't comfort me

[01:05:25] because I was really alone

[01:05:27] because I was feeling lonely

[01:05:30] and afraid to be alone

[01:05:32] out of that

[01:05:33] and I went back to that moment

[01:05:36] mentally

[01:05:37] against that child

[01:05:38] you shouldn't be sad, you should have played

[01:05:43] I'm the grown-up

[01:05:44] for you in your life

[01:05:45] I'm here the grown-up

[01:05:47] you're just a child

[01:05:49] and to comfort that child

[01:05:55] that has

[01:05:57] that child

[01:05:58] from then on you stuck me

[01:06:01] with that feeling

[01:06:02] that really freed me

[01:06:04] and healed

[01:06:04] and healed

[01:06:06] and now I'm also

[01:06:09] with that feeling

[01:06:11] of a future

[01:06:12] more mature version of myself

[01:06:16] can always come back

[01:06:17] to that moment and support me

[01:06:19] love and give everything

[01:06:21] that I need now

[01:06:23] cool young

[01:06:24] that's cool because you always said for yourself

[01:06:26] and you also know

[01:06:28] from bad moments

[01:06:31] a moment

[01:06:33] where you feel at the same time

[01:06:34] your own comfort from the future

[01:06:37] yes, that's cool

[01:06:43] today I thought about it

[01:06:45] no, that's not true

[01:06:58] and for yourself

[01:06:59] you're not feeling

[01:07:02] how it is now

[01:07:04] you're still in the process of life

[01:07:04] are you still in the process of life

[01:07:08] I look

[01:07:13] earlier at my emotional state

[01:07:15] that I

[01:07:17] really want to be a full-bodied woman

[01:07:20] who is in balance

[01:07:21] who touches herself

[01:07:24] and who is a majority

[01:07:25] in her unique way

[01:07:28] so

[01:07:29] I find it very nice to

[01:07:31] do something

[01:07:33] something about business psychology

[01:07:35] that's enterprise architecture

[01:07:37] there

[01:07:38] you have to form a lot

[01:07:40] of different aspects of a large organization

[01:07:44] to help with control

[01:07:47] actually

[01:07:48] so I think that

[01:07:50] because of that, so diverse

[01:07:52] I don't know what

[01:07:53] I would have done with enterprise architecture

[01:07:56] you just want to title it

[01:07:58] but it's

[01:07:58] how you form it

[01:08:00] you can also say it

[01:08:01] I get the answer

[01:08:03] and tell you a deep thought

[01:08:05] and then say it

[01:08:06] I don't know what it is

[01:08:10] that's just a title

[01:08:12] I think on my 41

[01:08:15] I'm

[01:08:16] in a happy state

[01:08:19] of being

[01:08:20] and also a balanced

[01:08:23] and generally calm state

[01:08:31] but still someone who brings a lot

[01:08:32] into the world

[01:08:34] yes, I think that fire

[01:08:36] and that dream won't change

[01:08:38] maybe you will be

[01:08:39] just content

[01:08:42] maybe that's the difference

[01:08:44] I think

[01:08:45] I'm content now with the small things

[01:08:48] for example on your life

[01:08:49] I was on a bike

[01:08:50] with my son

[01:08:53] that's nice

[01:08:54] he asked me about the same game

[01:08:57] I was thinking

[01:08:58] that this is ever-vomiting

[01:09:00] I'm like

[01:09:01] but now I know

[01:09:04] there are periods

[01:09:06] I'm 10 years old

[01:09:08] I'm 5 years old

[01:09:09] I'm not allowed to choose them

[01:09:10] just do something

[01:09:12] that's the luck

[01:09:14] in those smaller things

[01:09:15] and we will close that

[01:09:17] it's just a very important topic

[01:09:20] but it's overflown

[01:09:21] and it's about being grateful

[01:09:23] is that...

[01:09:25] do you think about it?

[01:09:29] I'm asking

[01:09:29] the feeling of love

[01:09:37] or the power

[01:09:38] and that fire

[01:09:42] gratefulness

[01:09:42] is not yet used

[01:09:45] that's what I see

[01:09:46] for example, at night

[01:09:49] 3 people would open a situation

[01:09:52] or for me to be grateful

[01:09:53] that they should go

[01:09:54] or that

[01:09:56] I should be grateful

[01:09:57] and that can be

[01:10:00] a conversation

[01:10:01] and

[01:10:02] I used to say that

[01:10:05] one day there was a little thing

[01:10:06] I started to

[01:10:10] start experimenting

[01:10:12] for or after meditations

[01:10:14] of course

[01:10:15] but it's like

[01:10:17] a baseline

[01:10:19] when you look at the world

[01:10:20] that it becomes

[01:10:22] more positive

[01:10:24] and

[01:10:25] I believe very hard

[01:10:26] that the 2 of us

[01:10:28] look at the world

[01:10:31] what we see

[01:10:33] is how you look at it

[01:10:35] and how

[01:10:36] that's why it's going to change

[01:10:38] so when I'm in a car

[01:10:40] and you're learning slip courses

[01:10:42] you always have to

[01:10:44] focus on the point you want to go

[01:10:47] with that car when it's on slip

[01:10:49] that's basically the same

[01:10:50] and what you pay attention to

[01:10:52] is the same principle

[01:10:55] and that's very easy

[01:10:59] 3 situations, 3 people

[01:11:02] 3 whatever situations

[01:11:04] that you're grateful for

[01:11:06] and that you can talk about

[01:11:07] and of course

[01:11:09] you feel that it's getting hot

[01:11:11] and that sort of

[01:11:13] that you're not

[01:11:15] doing a post

[01:11:17] or a mail

[01:11:18] or an end of the day

[01:11:21] but that's like

[01:11:21] and over time you're getting hot

[01:11:24] that you filter

[01:11:25] that you can really call it

[01:11:30] and that you can also call other people

[01:11:33] and I can

[01:11:35] I can

[01:11:36] I can sit at school

[01:11:38] and I was on the phone

[01:11:40] and Antoine with the bike

[01:11:42] but for one of the reasons

[01:11:44] my tire is flat

[01:11:46] and then I got the phone

[01:11:47] from that person from yesterday evening

[01:11:49] who had that podcast

[01:11:51] and she said

[01:11:52] I thought, oh, not the phone

[01:11:53] I'll put it on your hand

[01:11:56] and she said yes, take any time

[01:11:58] to thank you

[01:12:00] for the fact that I felt heard

[01:12:04] I felt like a family

[01:12:07] there was a lot of silence

[01:12:08] in the conversation

[01:12:09] and that was the person

[01:12:10] who was the marketing manager

[01:12:11] who went to the company for a few days

[01:12:13] on the 35th

[01:12:15] and

[01:12:18] and

[01:12:19] it's also a shame to tell

[01:12:22] because it's

[01:12:24] sexy, isn't it?

[01:12:25] you have to give all those titles

[01:12:26] and then you're going to be in a company

[01:12:28] and that's just very sexy

[01:12:29] and

[01:12:30] and yes, to thank you

[01:12:33] for the fact that I was there

[01:12:35] and that I was able to share

[01:12:36] and I thought that was really cool

[01:12:38] and yes

[01:12:40] so we can go over it very quickly

[01:12:41] and I was in a company

[01:12:42] and I was going to say

[01:12:46] I'm ashamed

[01:12:49] of you

[01:12:50] and you're also doing something with that game

[01:12:52] and that's

[01:12:53] that simple thing

[01:12:56] because we're going over it very quickly

[01:12:57] and I think it helps me

[01:13:00] to do it as a training

[01:13:02] to

[01:13:04] yes, that

[01:13:06] focus

[01:13:08] on the right thing

[01:13:10] because then you don't get the responsibility

[01:13:12] there's

[01:13:13] every situation

[01:13:16] how you look at it

[01:13:17] can you look positively or negatively

[01:13:19] and that sort of thing

[01:13:21] that people who can see everything

[01:13:24] negatively

[01:13:25] think it's too much

[01:13:28] and that it's too warm

[01:13:29] the sun is

[01:13:30] you don't know why

[01:13:32] it costs energy to be negative

[01:13:36] for those people, it's not going to be warm

[01:13:37] I think it's going to be warm

[01:13:41] I can't

[01:13:42] I can't

[01:13:43] then I have to spread it

[01:13:46] and everything is bad

[01:13:47] I think that's a good thing

[01:13:50] it's the simplest of things

[01:13:53] yes

[01:13:54] I think you should be thankful

[01:13:55] and that can

[01:13:57] it can also be

[01:13:58] that you just

[01:14:01] I saw a beautiful tree

[01:14:02] that can also be that

[01:14:03] it was just again

[01:14:06] but that's a thing to call it

[01:14:09] because they always want to

[01:14:11] go to

[01:14:11] I know that for sale, I know that

[01:14:14] then I know that

[01:14:15] it can be the same

[01:14:16] or a glass of bread that you just ate

[01:14:20] or the smell of grass that just has been removed

[01:14:23] it's

[01:14:23] a plant that's still grass

[01:14:25] but that's a green thing that comes around

[01:14:27] I have a lot of grass

[01:14:29] a lot of grass

[01:14:31] a lot of grass

[01:14:35] not to pollinate

[01:14:38] that's funny

[01:14:39] that

[01:14:41] you're now looking at

[01:14:42] the possibility

[01:14:44] for me it would have been so easy

[01:14:46] but my friend

[01:14:48] is now

[01:14:49] that I

[01:14:50] have been there for years

[01:14:51] actually

[01:14:54] in the sense of

[01:14:57] to colleagues

[01:14:58] friends

[01:14:58] I also immediately call

[01:15:01] what I appreciate

[01:15:02] so that's

[01:15:05] for me a gratefulness

[01:15:06] but I often call

[01:15:09] people themselves

[01:15:12] that's a thing

[01:15:13] that I notice the others

[01:15:15] can also be very positive

[01:15:17] and that they

[01:15:18] can also have a positive perception of me

[01:15:20] and also approach me positively

[01:15:24] so I think

[01:15:25] that the possibility

[01:15:27] you're now saying that it is a key

[01:15:29] ingredient

[01:15:29] to create more positivity

[01:15:33] in the world

[01:15:34] also around yourself

[01:15:37] and those small things

[01:15:38] that you start to notice

[01:15:42] because

[01:15:43] I have been to Luxembourg

[01:15:45] once

[01:15:47] from the Netherlands

[01:15:48] from the Netherlands

[01:15:50] through my street

[01:15:52] you said that you can go to Luxembourg

[01:15:54] I was a GER 5

[01:15:56] then it seemed to me that it was popular

[01:15:59] so I

[01:16:01] I have only been able to

[01:16:04] every week

[01:16:07] tent and backpack

[01:16:08] eat everything

[01:16:08] with me

[01:16:10] and

[01:16:12] then I think at the moment

[01:16:14] we start to laugh

[01:16:15] about really simple things

[01:16:17] regarding the face of a tree

[01:16:19] or just not a child playing

[01:16:21] we're not walking around the country

[01:16:23] and coming out of town

[01:16:26] we don't see much grass

[01:16:28] and I say

[01:16:29] in a big house

[01:16:31] like a child

[01:16:33] I think 6 years or so

[01:16:35] but it's just

[01:16:35] a huge attitude

[01:16:38] something from a tractor

[01:16:39] something that the father didn't use anymore

[01:16:42] he was a farmer

[01:16:43] then he gave me a little thing to play with

[01:16:46] and the little ones that crossed through the field

[01:16:48] I thought

[01:16:49] he has a very different youth

[01:16:52] than what I knew

[01:16:52] and I was really

[01:16:55] very emotional about how beautiful

[01:16:57] that was at that moment

[01:16:58] and how beautiful that child is

[01:17:01] and at that moment he was a part of me

[01:17:03] so that's

[01:17:05] the thing to feel grateful

[01:17:09] because you can

[01:17:11] find yourself in that

[01:17:12] every day

[01:17:15] and I think

[01:17:17] when you do that

[01:17:19] for yourself, you have something

[01:17:21] but if you share it

[01:17:23] with others

[01:17:24] that's what Peter says

[01:17:26] I appreciate you

[01:17:29] you were really good

[01:17:31] I listen to it

[01:17:32] I like it

[01:17:35] that's true

[01:17:36] ok

[01:17:39] Merci

[01:17:40] thank you

[01:17:41] I also watched it

[01:17:44] I said it to the people

[01:17:46] I had so much fun

[01:17:48] what do I want to say

[01:17:51] so

[01:17:53] can you share it?

[01:17:54] Merci, now to finish

[01:17:56] it wasn't strange

[01:17:57] that

[01:17:59] it was planned

[01:18:01] but you didn't know a thing

[01:18:03] that I was going to say

[01:18:03] that was the first thing I wanted to say

[01:18:09] that's going to be

[01:18:11] a little easier

[01:18:12] because it will go from god to hell

[01:18:16] now that's flow

[01:18:18] how do you say that

[01:18:19] that's true

[01:18:20] that's true

[01:18:22] talk, talk

[01:18:23] talk, talk about flow

[01:18:28] I was expecting

[01:18:29] a moment of flow

[01:18:32] and I said yesterday

[01:18:33] to that friend

[01:18:35] that I was going to say

[01:18:37] that's what I thought it was

[01:18:40] maybe

[01:18:44] part 2

[01:18:46] I know

[01:18:46] that's

[01:18:50] but anyway

[01:18:51] thank you very much

[01:18:52] that was super fun

[01:18:54] I love you

[01:18:54] and good luck

[01:18:56] and all that you do

[01:18:58] and you're a great person

[01:19:00] I think the best is yet to come

[01:19:02] how do you say the best is yet to come

[01:19:05] Merci, thanks for being here

[01:19:07] it was fun

[01:19:09] thank you for listening

[01:19:10] now again a great conversation

[01:19:12] I hope you understood something

[01:19:13] or learned something

[01:19:15] and that you gave yourself

[01:19:16] to live closer to yourself

[01:19:18] and to take your life in your hands

[01:19:21] while you buy one of the books

[01:19:22] that we discussed

[01:19:23] then go back to psgrow.com

[01:19:26] that is

[01:19:27] it would be super cool

[01:19:31] if you could also be your favorite

[01:19:32] thanks to a review

[01:19:33] that ends on iTunes, Spotify or Youtube

[01:19:36] and for the rest I wish you a fantastic

[01:19:38] live, fantastic week

[01:19:40] fantastic day until next week

[01:19:42] dance day